Will be available on CD. Retail/Wholesale orders: Random Factors 3754 W 170th St Torrance, CA, USA 90504-1204   NOT AVAILABLE FOR ORDER YET People have been bugging me for a long time to do a CD that was funny. I seem to be some kind of comic at times, so I figured I should throw out one that included some of the parodies I've written (some of which have gotten me thrown out of some pretty high-class dives in my time) and some others that I have always enjoyed. This is not going to be a "fancy" CD. Most of the songs are just me and a guitar (or whatever) with little overdubbing or fancying up. Think of it as me sitting in your living room being strange .... Some of these were recorded "live" at Mrs. Grundy's Bar & Grill & Bait Shop (in between or during barfights) so the audio might not be "studio" quality. Sorry 'bout that! This CD is rated PG-13, so beware. It's kinda racy in spots and it may not be suitable for your maiden aunt, children, or small nervous dogs, so don't take it too seriously. You've been warned! you may have to smuggle it into Canada SIDE ONE Introduction on stage at Mrs Grundy's Irish Bar and Bait Shop in Ajo, Arizona. Sample MP3 Planxty Seamus (Lyrics: © 1991 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Wearin' Of The Green") BMI Sample MP3 Yet another "tired of St. Patrick's Day" song......Gawd! Funny part is that the wanna-bees in the club didn't notice any difference in the words, and the real Irish (and Scots) were dying with laughter. All that's missing is Seamus' voice roaring out of the kitchen at the end of the song: "GET OUT OF MY BAR!" Unanswered Questions (Lyrics: © 1994 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Villikins And His Dinah") BMI Sample MP3 Did you ever wake up in the middle of the night and wonder what you did with your thumbs when you were asleep? This one is just a compendium of Weird Thoughts that jump into my head at 0-dark-thirty in the morning. I have to live in this brain; you're only visiting .... "Wild Rover" No More (Lyrics: © 1993 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Wild Rover") BMI Sample MP3 I spent a little while playing backup with a Celtic band known as "Celtic Pride" (Tom and Marie Teven) and came up with this one in a moment of silliness. I think Tom is still singing it! I Am Cow Sample MP3 Written by "The Arrogant Worms," a band from Canada, who are entirely off the deep end. I sing it because we need more songs about cows. Thanks to First Temple of Nyarlathotep and the Reformed Nyarlathotepian Chorus in East Ajo for joining in on the song! Monongahela Sal (Robert W. Schmertz) Sample MP3 Got this one from Pete Seeger, and it's simply delightful. Robert Schmertz was an architect in Pittsburg, and remains a local musical legend. Brilliant songwriter - somewhat of an American version of Britain's Flanders and Swann. His lyrics just flow naturally, as if you were speaking. SIDE TWO Nude (Lyrics: © 1993 WJ Bethancourt III / Ed Hirt; Tune: Traditional "Men of Harlech") BMI Sample MP3 Ed and I wrote this one quite a while back, while sitting around looking for trouble. It's one that has appeared in quite a few medieval re-enactment and science-fiction songbooks. Random Canyon (Peter Staempfel) Sample MP3 What can you say about Peter Staempfel other than he is Sick and Wrong in too many ways. This is a subtly humorous song about the Glory of the West, but I think there was a little too much Wacky Weed in there somewhere. It's right up there on the Silly Scale with Walt Kelly's songs. Of course, given that mastodon herd up around the headwaters of the Hassayampa, I can't be too sure this isn't just simple truth. Baby-O (Grandpa Jones) Sample MP3 Seems as how this traveling salesman came by one day .... A Pause For Famous Banjo Salve (© 2010 WJ Bethancourt III) Sample MP3 Don't just stand there! Buy some! Talking Guitar Blues (Lyrics: Ernest Tubb) The Word Song (© 1980 WJ Bethancourt III) Sample MP3 It's not all cute groupies and free food .... some will remember this one from the nights at Funny Fellows. I still get requests for it. There's A Hole In The Stardrive (Lyrics: © 1995 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "There's A Hole In The Bucket") BMI Sample MP3 Some things will never change, I guess. The Five Hundred Pound Mouse Blues (© 1974 WJ Bethancourt III) BMI Sample MP3 People ask me where I learned to play the blues. I started out as a seeing-eye child for the great Blind Lemon Pledge down in New Orleans. I'd lead him around from streetcorners to his flophouse, or to the local red-light house so's he could play and I'd watch and listen, and then practice while he was asleep. I learned the blues from him. A great blues man. After a while, I'd learned everything he did, so I pushed him under a bus and I became Blind Lemon Pledge. Stole his guitar, streetcorner, gigs, hat and shades, Don't got no seeing-eye child though. They're treacherous. SIDE THREE The Other Molly Malone (Lyrics: © 1996 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Molly Malone") BMI Sample MP3 Another 0-dark-thirty in the morning song .... this is another one of those that tends to get me thrown out of Irish pubs. Young Folks, Old Folks (Lyrics © 1993 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Walking In The Parlor") BMI Sample MP3 Comparative Religion tends to be quite a lot of fun. I wrote this one for my neo-Pagan friends to giggle over. Byte Of The Loan Snark (Lyrics: © 1992 Joe Bethancourt/Matt Mason; Tune: "Die Moritat von Mackie Messer," 1923 Kurt Weill) Sample MP3   Matt and I came up with this in correspondence over the old FidoNet (a pre-InterTubes thing) some time back. The references are to Lewis Caroll's "Alice In Wonderland" and "The Hunting Of The Snark," for those who wish to pursue it further. Some Snarks are Boojums, and all Boojums are Snarks. This is Very Significant, and a Good Thing To Know. Second guitar is played by Dennis Putscher, and Double-valve Oxymoronica by Hermione Nerfge.   London Derriere (Lyrics: © 1995 WJ Bethancourt III; Tune: Traditional "Londonderry Aire") BMI Sample MP3 I always wanted to parody this one with the obvious pun .... sang this at the local Irish pub, and got alternately yelled at in between gales of hysterical laughter .... the local Irish community still orders doubles to brace themselves if I walk into a session. GREAT fun! Da Banjo Needed Killin' (© 2010 WJ Bethancourt III) Sample MP3 The weapons of mass dilapidation used on this CD are: Gold Tone Custom White Lady 5 string banjo, Martin 000C Steve Miller Pegasus guitar, Taylor 714CE guitar, Taylor 754CE 12-string guitar, Guild F-412 12-string guitar, Double-valve Oxymoronica, Goya G-30 Classical Guitar, Saga Guitane D-500 guitar and Weissenborn Hawaiian guitar. Thanks always to Mrs Grundy's Irish Bar and Bait Shop, where the music plays until the fight starts. Engineer & Creative Insanity: Dennis Putscher Producer: Joe Bethancourt Executive Producers: John & Mary Creasy In Memoriam: Moosie the Cat